wow. When I'm done with him he's going to have to pop his collar in necessity and not just douchery
Alex texted me. Bootycall boy #2. its like an alarm goes off once i'm single that the line is open again
sometimes i wish i had a whole other life to spend on youtube
Idk, it's Grover wearing a sombrero. Do I need a reason?
By the end of the cruise, there was literally nothing in our room he hadn't peed on.
I was more concerned about the amount of mcdonalds fries on the floor around me than i was with my lack of clothes.
Cancel that soberness update. I just almost fell down in the security line
My password hint says "not sunset, also facebook." i need to stop doing computer things while high. I will never figure this clue out.
Your cat is quite the conversationalist after some tequila and shrooms
I tried to make friends with the geese living behind Hughes. They didn't really like that idea.
Are you high?
Only you would consider your best friend fucking your boyfriend to be a sign of everlasting friendship
Like I blink, and he's face first in my vagina.
so apparantly i made out with 24 santas last night...and an elf...and a stoner
I had to explain to an ER nurse that I burned my dick playing onion ring toss today, your social awkwardness hardly compares.
As much as I hate to admit it, some day ill need a man because I can't open jars myself and you can't 69 a dildo
Like I don't even know how to respond to this?
Randomize
