puking up blue gatorade is not as nearly as much fun as it sounds
The only comparison I have for the iPhone is that it's like youre constantly getting a blow job
Hey man thanks for carrying me in and out of that frat house. There's no I in team.
shes the kind of girl that would cock block endangered pandas
I had 5 long islands and 2 alien brain hemorrhages…I am entirely certain that the "power hour to finish the night" idea was just too much.
Getting drunk and throwing things at people isnt the same with you not here. Remember when you dislocated my elbow and then popped it back in in one motion?
The great part about clubs is that you can fart everywhere and nobody knows! The bad part is I'm on e and i have nobody to fondle.
Ok, they now been on the roof for two days. I can see 4 cases of teecate and a carton of smokes. They are yelling at "fucking fall" and pissing off the roof.
She's lucky her pussy is worth listening to her ramble about bedroom furniture for 30 minutes
Taco Bell is giving high school kids free tacos STEAL YOUR BROTHER'S WALLET I'LL BRING THE WEED.
Were you the one who yelled "FOR GLORYHOLE!" then punched a hole through my door?
We got cut off at a bar at 4pm. We aren't human
I JUST PETTED A FUCKING SQUIRREL. A SQUIRREL.
i am not an asshole. i paid for her to take a cab home.
dude, we were in ann arbor. she's from cincinnati. ten bucks didn't even get her back on I-94. i maintain my position. you are indeed an asshole.
What's the weirdest place you've ever had sex?
I don't think you're psychologically prepared for this conversation.
Randomize
