I mean I can't believe yesterday ended w/ your house getting firebombed. What an unexpected turn of events
Fucking love it maybe bedazzle some baby seals? Make them cuter? Who would club a bedazzled baby seal? Only a fucking monster.
If i die in the snow, get to my laptop and delete all of the nickelback. password is "barry"
as in "white"?
Look at it this way: if he'll have sex with a tomato, he'll have sex with you.
I just introduced him to multiple male orgasms. I love wine AND tequila
Judging by the amount of alcohol multiplied by the amount of her exes here, tonight will be ending in tears.
Using the ceiling fan to slice the hotdogs in mid-air can only be contributed to our liberal use of 1800.
I am downstairs in the bar now having a beer...actually I ordered two beers and placed one across from me in front of an open chair. I did this for appearance sake, so nobody knew I was double fisting all alone. I'm getting hungry now. I'm thinking of ordering two meals just to keep appearances up.
He showed up in booty shorts and no shirt and said dont laugh dont ask questions and give me a fucking final and no one in class said anything we just sat there speehless
It was about the point the universe collapsed in on itself and I was a singularity of insanity that I realized I was tripping balls.
I AM A HOUSE CAT. I CANNOT DO THIS LION BUSINESS WE CALL THE SINGLE LIFE
You lit a fire in my vagina no man can extinguish.
Like I cant decide if he's like autistic or something or just seriously cock blocks himself on purpose with this shit
Road head absolutely translates. That's the beauty of road head... It's so portable!
I'm going to draw something on my chest and I need to incorporate my nipples. Any ideas?
Randomize
