Whatcha textin bout Willis?
I just spent the last 30 minutes shaving my asshole.
It's summer and yet I still can't have one library session w/o seeing someone who has had their penis in me.
I would not wish his dick upon my worst enemy
Definitely need to find a less healthy bootycalls. All this bitch got in her fridge is feta, English muffins and wheat grass. What the fuck can I make with that???
Found 2 Coors, problem solved.
her 18 year old son fed me pieces of a french roll like a pigeon, as I lay on the floor of the bathroom crying.
Hooker in the library. I repeat, we have a hooker in the library. This is not a drill.
I am a woman. I need to be selective about the porn I stream on my phone. Who knows if my cell will ever get lost, who will see it and what they'd think otherwise. Keepin' it classy tampa.
I've learned life lessons in Vegas. Mostly, drugs are cheaper than alcohol.
Our relationship needs a sober moment
I'll call you when that happens
Can you send me the pictures of me riding the penis
He called my boobs fluffy. Part sexy part pilsbury dough boy. Part sexy pilsbury dough boy. I'm so confused. And flattered?
Is there evidence of another human being getting away with this/ not dying?
I hooked up with a guy named Quan.. I literally hit the Quan
You came into the club around midnight with a carton of tropicana o.j. & said you were starting a revolution.
Randomize
