shes wearing a jean skirt, its frayed. i got this
epic walk of shame this morning involving 2 subway transfers. I need to start sexing locally.
The bride says you won't want any of the single ladies...
Let's let the open bar be the judge of that.
He scored a 8.5/10 on that girls powerpoint. Of course I slept with him
You act like this is the first time I literally thought I was invisible.
I had to carry you down because your legs weren't moving anymore but you were carrying the weights you stole from that guys room... and that's where the bruises came from.
Am I undercharging for one hour of sex per essay? I need a serious business answer.
i told you that I felt like my feet were melting into the ground and you starting blowing on them to put out the "invisible fire". thanks friend.
Its only.eleven and we are already chasing a man on a bike with a bag full of burger king
All i know is we had 4 people on a tandum bike, and told the cops we couldnt stop because our momentum was so good.
This isn't fair. Why can't sober me be good at bejeweled?
He was nothing but deer-caught-in-headlight eyes and dick, it was adorable
I just gargled with NyQuil
One of the Mormon boys that comes to the door is really sexy and I always think 'I would absolutely destroy your faith'
Basically, I am an endless fountain of unconvential sexual experiences and knowledge.
Randomize
