1:32a: I quit. signing up for eharmony. Don't judge
That arnold schwarzeneger picture looks strikingly similar to paul
Not half as good looking as paul
I'd say paul has bigger bicep peaks, but who am I to judge
Hey, kurt drew a penis on you and wrote my innotals. I had nothing to do a/ that.
she said 'i love fried rice', threw a condom at me and passed out naked.
We called dibs on each other's genitals. That bond is unbreakable.
I am so juiced up on period drugs and coffee I feel like my skin is going to fall off.
You're cock blocking me from my own boyfriend. What kind of shit is that?
I miss her, but also fucked her ex boyfriend.... So there's that
Yeah you burned that bridge with your vagina
I found pix on her phone of me passed out and her sticking things up my ass. Its over.
We just won 1800 at the casino and are going to the strip club. Who gives a fuck if it's 5pm
He sent me a 2am email the just said "Ping". Nerdiest booty call ever.
SOMETIMES YOU HAVE TO BLAST VANESSA CARLTON IN YOUR CAR AT MIDNIGHT TO FEEL AGAIN. IDK.
When the state fair security guard came to yell at her for having outside food and drink she threatened to kick him if he tried to stop her and then she proceeded to chug the whole bottle.
classic
Howd it go?
Well we had the "no we're not fucking on the porch" conversation but then we totally fucked on the porch. So I'd say alright.
Yeah. Of all the things to be cock blocked by a plague is the most unexpected.
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