He has that thing where they hang SUPER low
Ewww!! Elephantitis
you made me watch la bamba, and then you yelled at me for disrespecting your mexican heritage.
Black out sex on the trampoline? yes please.
All I remember was after sex she kept trying to take pictures of my dick "for memories"
He looks like he'd be great Lego character.
It's like a teen mom casting at the Obgyn's office. I feel great about my positive life decisions.
We have started to decorate penises.
The last thing I remember was wearing a sombrero and trying to do cartwheels in the club
You did one successfully. Then smashed into the wall
easter 2014 is on 4/20 THIS IS NOT A DRILL YOUR FAMILY WILL EXPECT YOU TO BE HOME AND SOBER I REPEAT THIS IS NOT A DRILL
My alarm went off and I went straight for your dick. That's dedication.
I just bought a bong from a hot dog stand.
I got into a fight with the dude who fell asleep on my couch bc he wouldn't wake up but managed to get a lunch date set for thurs with another guy by the time he finally left. So how's your day so far?
You took off your shirt and pulled out a bottle of cherry uv and a slushee. That's when I knew you came to party
Also I found $40 in the women's bathroom at ihop. Karma is finally kicking in!
That was the first time i’ve been physically intimidated by a LinkedIn profile.
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