ok shes still asleep, should i pee on her and say she did it herself? and by the time you respond to this ill probably have already made the decision
So he asked me last night if I would cheer him on while he masturbated...
there was enough confetti in my bra to throw another NYE party
it was one of those movies netflix should have sent weed with
Before you become official, we should get a hotel room and fuck our brains out. Sort of like a going away party for your penis.
You do realize that we got a stripper to do the YMCA for us on the main stage... Right?
EVERYONE CAN HEAR YOU FUCKING YOU ARE IN A TENT
I think my uterus is still laying in your bed somewhere under the covers.
I'm sorry you couldn't sneak away today. You're the only guy I'm fucking that I can talk with about the other guys I'm fucking, and I need some advice
We can just keep having sex until one of us finds someone we actually like
His search history includes homemade sex toys and a plunger. I'm scared about what goes on in their place.
I think she's going to be dangerous to drink with, but I'm ready for the adventure.
I hope you get stoned and think that you're a seal in shark infested waters
Nothing says hangover like being in the doctors office getting a tampon removed from deep inside
why yes, bad decisions will be made starting at 3PM Thurs through 8PM on Sun. You have been warned. Plan accordingly.
Randomize
