Sorry I thought I was a lizard earlier.
i got lost in a forest last night. this morning I realized the "forest" was just 6 trees on campus.
I shaved my legs finally. I am starting to remember what my skin feels like.
Studying for the exam.. Identifying the portraits using phrases like "large penis"
Every time she shows up on my newsfeed, I get the taste of tequila in my mouth.
Getting too drunk for the hot dog vendor to serve me is possibly a sign of an alcohol problem. I threw up in the sewer grates next to his stand
It would be one hovered percent delicioui
The only image of you you know is from reflections or pictures. Its 2d. But what other people see is 3d. How do you know that's your real face! MIND.BLOWN.
She told me she ate a whole pizza today, and I just wanted to hug her forever.
Hyyypothetically, what would you do if you happened to see my boobs on the internet?
Did you leave ur panties in the sink?
Kitchen or bathroom?
I AM STRANGELY AROUSED BY THIS UNEXPECTED DEVELOPMENT AND I AM COMPLETELY OK WITH THIS.
Conversations really do change when your social worker had your dick in her mouth the other night.
Eh, it could have been worse. I may or may not have been wearing a jedi cloak while getting my dick sucked.
I’m going down on him like an Oompah Loompah on roller skates.
That makes no sense, but good luck
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