so... how was it???
he had bart simpson sheets. he had itunes on shuffle and "don't worry be happy" started playing when he took his boxers off. sad to say i was neither worried nor happy
I told him he can't put it there till we're exclusive. That's totally The Relationship Hole.
I just wiped my vajayjay with snow. Bad idea.
The hardest part of getting a new computer is deliberating whether to start the cycle of porn and viruses all over again.
How creepy of a mustache can you grow by wednesday night?
My New Years Resolution is to come up with a new resolution monthly. January: decrease my shotgunning consumption speed to 7 seconds or less.
Then he said something about how from that angle I looked just like his mom.
She looks like a junkie muppet...awful
Tell him to dress up like Shaggy and kidnap him then bring him to me. We can pretend. Imaagination.
It's snowing in May and there was a law school party at the strip club. The end is near.
i think ive reached a prime reproductive point in my life or somethin- i see gingers and all i want to do is have their babies. like my body knows that i have a to carry on a legacy
pray to the hookup gods
Do not try to steal a picnic table from a park, all you will end up with are sore arms and broken dreams.
What is the acceptable way to offer a trade of sex for a few hours of body heat?
I guess "hi, I know your mom, she taught me in high school" is an effective pickup line
Randomize
