Fyi: he's overweight and balding. My biological clock is ticking so loud I can't hear the TV.
I guess what I'm trying to say is you've fucked more people than the economy.
I just watched a woman break three wood planks with her boobs. I don't know how I feel about that
I seriously dont think i have ever ridden a horse sober.
You told the waitress last night "What tip bracket do I have to be in to see your boobs"
i want to get drunk and sing the national anthem on your roof again please.
He came out in cowboy boots and underpants holding a beer while he hugged my mom. I love Montana.
Thing I said while arguing: I want to be single again so that I can have pizza and dick rained down upon me.
Pulling out all the stops on being a lady.
Fell asleep with Kristen and woke up with Sarah. It's official, vacation has begun.
No no this isn't that fun. I'm alone drinking wine and me and the dogs ran out of things to talk about around 9 am.
He told me he sees me like a sister then 10 mins later tried to make out with me.
ok but bondage is pretty much my easy mode
how do you know everyone's mad at you?
I just woke up feeling shameful
the fact that I've been his fuck buddy for a year, and I'm pregnant isn't bothering me. the fact that he didn't tell me about his girlfriend does.
Ate a slug for 39 dollars
I wouldn't expect anything less from a PhD student
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