I'm gonna do things to you that will make the neighbors want to move.
Haha na a cat just ran under your car. Howd that happen?
Probably a woman cat. Doesnt think things through
were not allowed back there because i puked on the waitresses foot while trying to order another round. for myself.
It was like having sex with a donkey. Everytime she got close she would kick me.
does she really think making her boyfriend delete me on facebook is going to magically stop us from hooking up?
He went bowling in his bathroom.. And shattered the toilet.
I got my dick out in a gay bar for just one free shot. I didn't know I could be bought so cheap
Anyone see the sob who took the piñata?
He had a drawn-on fu manchu and now my vagina has one too.
who is the naked dude on the coffee table
thats jeff, jeff is nice so don't be rude
You ruined a cute cat because your lack of horniness
just woke up on the floor with a bottle in my hand. and by bottle, i mean a baby bottle. half filled with tequila.
We can only continue to use the "oh what's the difference between circumcised and uncircumcised" for a few more months before people will see through our lies
My boyfriend and my fuck buddy are going to the strip club together... Should I be concerned?
Just got my second shot
Baller. We’re going to be knee deep in strippers and coke in 10 days
Randomize
