Apparently I signed "I love you" on my bar tab last night.
how are pickles made is in the google history again... why do you always wonder that, and forget the answer?
yes he's amazing in bed. he made me like, black out. everything went black it was weird. so yes, i'd fuck him again. plus, he has every season of buffy on dvd
I found them in the kitchen microwaving bottle rockets chanting U.S.A U.S.A U.S.A
She has no definite jawline and all of her photo's have Ke$ha quotes as captions followed by a "<3" Even by your standards that is embarrassing.
im wtih 32a right now bc 34d is on her period. now i know how girls feel when their hookups go from magnums to regulars
You have dresses for different occasions. I need different men's dicks too. It's logic.
Things in my bed this morning: a Waffle House hat, a finding nemo DVD, sharpies, my graduation robes and an adult diaper. Did we play drunk scavenger hunt again?
I need a thor helmet and I need to find my heavy duty drinking mug
I told my coworker that I'm going to a dinner party and was asked to bring wine and pregnancy tests and he was like.. I miss being 20
I'd give anything to be driving a pirate ship wearing nothing but a coconut bra and a grass skirt eating a pizza and watching dolphins jump in the waves. Dreams ya gotta have dreams
Currently using my kid's computer to charge my vibrator. #thisis30ish
You sealing the pinky promise with a shot was much better than just kissing it
I just woke up, its 6AM and i'm pretty sure the guy passed out next to me is 70% ugly...
Oh my god my purse is too heavy for me to dance with boys cause it has too many stolen sink faucets in it
Randomize
