how was the sex?
he smelled like pickles and burnt hair.
well, there's that.
I just made $100 from people paying me not to get naked at the party... I need those P90X dvds
Okay so if I'm going to keep referring to my hangover in the third person it needs a name.
I wish there was some sort of "recently added" function for blackberrys so i could see what random numbers i got from the night before
his profile picture is him throwing up "#1" hands after his lax championship next to his coach that i fucked....embarrasing for him, yet ironically beautiful for me.
Rode my bike to work still drunk. Almost threw up on a camper while getting him out of his parents car.
Maybe your new years resolution should be not to fuck in Sears bathroom anymore.
So it sounded like a midget was barfing IN our walls again this morning ...
Why do I have a bunch of cash....and your bra.
You thought you were drunk? I woke up at 6 o'clock this morning with a cheeseburger in my left hand a drink in my right with my window half way down. it was raining.... fml
I just love that it's Veterans Day because I know in my heart that I have serviced some of their brethren in the dirtiest, hottest, most shameful ways possible.
We were like ok let's be eachothers maid of honor and then you were like "ok see you at the wedding" and walked away
The closest I'll come to committing is leaving sex toys at their house
that was the most beautifully crafted sentence ive ever read that involved the phrase "genitals or whatever"
Just saw the pics from the bachelor party. When the hell did we go to southie. And why was there a chicken in the limo..? You guys really are my best friends.
Randomize
