he put his p in my v, then his p in my a, and then tried to put the p in my m? first, double dipping is rude. second, i'm glad he finished shortly after that, i'm afraid of where he'd try to stick it next. my ear?
So he asked me last night if I would cheer him on while he masturbated...
shape ups are the best shoes to wear when youre stoned. its like walking on little trampolines every step.
I brought up my Bobbly Flay drinking game in the interview. Of course I got the job.
This is one of those times where I really wish my vagina could tell me what happened last night.
We talked him into tasing himself.
She had one unshaved part on her vagina that she called "the soul patch" I just didn't know what to think
I woke up at 6am to a knock and a naked guy at my window.
one renamed every person in my phone 'I lpvw tewqils', so it would really help me out if you could text me your name. Happy sunday!
Hey, so, you were my "one phone call" last night... Thanks for not picking up. See, this is why I never call you.
You were supposed to behave this weekend.
But... naked.
So, if you eat too many protein bars, you will shit your pants. This I learnt today..... at work.
I think i should either cut my hair or buy a dildo.
A stripper choked me last night. Then I choked her. Now we're going on a date this Saturday.
I can’t tell if I have feelings for him or if my vagina does.
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