You gave him head? He fingered you? A little bit of make out?
WHAT THE FUCK ITS LIKE YOU WERE THERE
Phease come get me i thought i was in a place i don't even understand
What's your middle initial? I need it for the census. I put us down as "unmarried partners."
Oh my god... you're gay. Ps, its A.
No no. According to the 2010 US Census, we're gay.
Well, if they're both my boyfriend.. Then i cheated on both of them.
not to mention it took an hour of antique roadshow to calm my dick down
I don't remember much but I remember it was a unanimous decision that Santa was indeed real and Cait's stripping somehow proved this.
My professor just told me I'm living a lie and I found puke on my pants. How do you think it's going?
And I might get them triple pierced after that
Damn, I didn't realize you'd declared war on airport metal detectors
Anxiously awaiting my period drinking Hershey's syrup from the bottle. Don't judge me
Just saw Santa sitting on a restaurant patio drinking beer and using his free hand to gesture to cars that he's watching them
Why are you there anyways?
Pickin up ball pit balls from craigslist
She's not a foreskin expert like you
You said "I feel like a koala bear. Do you ever just feel like a koala bear?" This is your brain on drugs.
I had just gotten to his place and was about to get some dick. No way was I gonna let her negative attitude affect my orgasm feng shui
If everyone felt the happiness from apple crown royal we would be in a better place
Randomize
