But never have I ever had sex with a dirty talker before, so it was something else, to say the least. I signed up to get laid, not play Penthouse Mad Libs.
This bar is like a mediocre whore house....but free
Oh. Im drinking alone in a banana costume. Every time youre feeling down, i want you to think of me right now and know that your life is better than mine.
So Delta doesn't take cash. I used my card to buy a drink and asked the attendant if she could leave it open.
I don't care how hungover you are were not listening to enya
Do you think if I puke at the gym they think is because I'm going hard walking on the treadmill?
At least I know she didn't hear me crawl to my room. Or did I walk on my hands? Fuck if I know.
i told him i should keep a toothbrush at his house for after all the times i threw up there. he said yes but i wasnt getting a key to the apt
Turning 21 will be slightly bittersweet. Never again will I be able to get underage drunk at Disney World, now I'll only be able to get legal drunk and that just sets a whole different and sad tone for my life.
I definitely don't remember licking the drag queens boob.
You give an incredible blow job. I wanted to make sure you know it was appreciated
You got stoned and bought $300 worth of pudding. Again! Why do YOU think she left you?
I can't believe you cupped pat's balls to prove your fake relationship
We peed on a building I think...like a building in downtown...not out of view of anyone.
We spent our last night together taking turns vomiting in the bathroom. I'd say it was a romantic trip.
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