The two bassists just totally made out. I NEED MENNA'S RIGHT now.
i don't care what she did to you. we are not having sex in front of your sister.
so i decided to listen to you and went ahead and slept with him. you owe me 3 minutes
But sometimes ur dick treats me better than u do
why are there beer bottles in my dishwasher?
All I really need to know is how to say "where is the bathroom" and "I don't take it in the butt anymore". I think that will suffice.
wait, how does the 20 year old one night stand pregnant girl have a superiority complex?
Theres either a bag of coke in my pocket or a bag of anthrax, either way last night got way to serious
Whiskey??
It will be at least another 6 weeks before I say yes again. I'm bruised. I stole sex cards and a really nice pocket knife. I acquired a vial of my own blood. Talk about a yard sale...
I was afraid she wouldn't be able keep up but I woke up in a bathtub, she called me a pussy and made me pancakes.
SUNS OUT COOCHY OUT
If I send Ben a tit pic but I do it while wearing a Tom Brady mask is that funny or creepy
Swimming turned traumatic when grampas shorts slipped off..
Lets just say the phase, What a dick, has a whole new meaning at the urinals.
when she didn't finish her burrito you wanted to call the cops because you said it was neglect
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