She'll never know what hit her
I dunno. Girls tend to recognize ball-to-chin contact.
She looked like cheddar but tasted like limburger...
The only thing I can remember you saying is "I won't cut pizza like this when I'm older."
And if not, hey- I've never had a restraining order before, so that will be cool
It could be our claim to fame
Done. I'll pack a cooler.
lets grab drinks (in a friendly, not super awkward because ive eaten your ass kind of way) sometime soon
wow.
The mass text at 3:12AM offering "free scrotum tastings" will have repercussions
This is a rough morning for me
No, rough is puking in your froyo cup next to a five year old and her grandma.
On a scale of 1-10 how seriously are we considering being sugar babies?
I'm about a 7.95
I've been buying my puppy dildos for chew toys. I can't wait till a girl comes over and my dog is gnawing on a giant black cock
My mom just gave me my fake back to buy her more wine.
i think the sex is so good because i get a contact high just from fucking him
He kept singing Happy Birthday to himself, yelling at the bouncers for not letting him in, and telling them his "father will hear of this." He was like a drunken Scottish Draco Malfoy.
I just almost caught my floor on fire, then decided I could put it out with my knuckles! So I'm doing good!
That's Danny the boy who threw up in the Doritos bag
Dude. why do I feel like I am cheating on you every time I do shrooms?
Randomize
