I can see my step sister's thong. Don't know if I should let myself be turned on or not
There is something about listening to Patsy Cline while pooping that makes the experience so much better.
its likemy ribs anf my hesrt aew cuddlingn
Some chick just barfed in my math class. Everyone here is hungover. Yay community college
Well, it was good.. One step forward for my vaj.. One giant leap backwards for my integrity.
She cheated on me with the same state trooper that wrote me a ticket.
I guess now you have a way to keep your license when you bring that up in court.
Dude, you are the most awesome.
I'm beginning to think the only reason I get laid anymore is girls are fantasizing sleeping with my dad...
So to distract myself from jackies vomiting, im making up a story in my head. It's called the little penis that could
his teacher called to say he gave a girl on the playground a rock to touch his penis. proudest moment of my fatherhood
I just replaced the poop spray with an air horn... Now we wait!
so at 3am I stumbled into my parents house and crawled into bed with them, I need to start dating.
COME AND FUCKING GET ME I AM IN SOME SORT OF JUNKYARD!!!
You made the lady who made your cheeseburger sign the box so that when she got famous you would have her autograph.
Do you know how hard it is to have sex on an air matress while there are people sleeping in the same room?!?!?
And to be clear I have only watched porn like 3 times at work
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