Dude, she uses Old Spice. It smelled like I was eating out my grandfather.
You had sex with him even after he literally described himself as a "coldplay guy"? There's a line you just don't cross. There is a line.
season finale of lost and an oz of weed. tonight my mind is going to be blown.
He calls it "his noble steed" and i plan to ride it.
Stop giving guys blow jobs because you're no good and it's messing up my sex life. Word gets around & then they think it's me and don't believe me when I say I have a twin. Learn to stuck dick right.
I had so much drainage I couldn't moan properly. Fuck allergy season
Wanna smoke some ancient weed I just found in a box of cake mix?
If you don't ever hear from me again, just know that I loved you
Jesus Christ that's like a real possibility
MORE IMPORTANTLY I THINK I JUST WATCHED SOMEONE GET SO LONELY AS TO TURN BISEXUAL??
There's nothing quite like having a little 8 year old boy hand me a Bible on campus while I'm on my way to the health center because of my recent slutty tendencies.
We have a lot of substance abuse to do tomorrow its sleep time
Apparently last night I yelled "the cops were called on a mother fucker and that mother fucker is me." And then proceeded to exorcise a sandwitch.
I just had a twenty minute discussion about endangered breed dog breeding with an Extremely drunk guy
So many questions...
anyone can pick a bar fight and pick up a waitress at a bar, not everyone hangout with two wolves. TWO WOLVES.
He sent me a snap with the dog tongue filter. I might have to bench him.
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