so im kinda of nervous about the whole bust inside event last night
Looking at the victoria's secret website makes the ice cream I'm eating taste like sadness and obesity
You did not just play the dead husband card again.
sometimes i think i'm bisexual but then i realize the only girl i'm attracted to is myself.
advice for life: when the cop takes your tallboy, don't ask for your coozy back
My rats are drinking wine. I am drinking with rats. God i am so alone.
I think if I could use my boobs as a second pair of hands everything would be ok
No, I googled it. Apparently, male thongs are the next snuggy and a lot of guys love wearing them for the support.
My text message history should be ashamed of itself right now.
Doc gave me something stronger than Xanax. The pills have your last name imprinted on them. This cannot be coincidence.
I had a drink called "the white nun." It tasted like Marshmallows, and celibacy.
We played Rock Paper Scissors to see who would have to go down on the other person.
She deliberately backed into the homewrecker's whoremobile and yelled ""FOR SPARTA!"
he made that chewbacca noise when he came. like father like son i guess.
MANIFESTATION IS REAL AND IM GETTING LAID TONIGHT
Randomize