does dane cook know its not 2004 and that hes no longer relevant?
first off, his name is dougie. strike one.
yeah except there is a correlation between drinking moonshine and going blind, which kind of concerns me
I enjoyed our heart to heart in the trunk on the way to the stripclub
the paramedics asked what clubs id be in next weekend so they can plan ahead.
Just missed the last train for another 5 hours. There are balls in or around the mouth of my life.
I AM OBSESSED WITH PORCHES. YOU ARE OBSESSED WITH PORCHES. HOW IS THIS REAL?
how are you shocked you fucked her? sure shes hot, but she also washed your beerpong balls in her mouth..... you should probably get tested.
Everyone is speaking Spanish and this 300 hundred pound chick is talking about the time she got out of prison... Fuck this place
You were definitely drunk. You gave him an otphj in front of everyone.
I feel like they've probably fucked. Like.. you don't just bring a bitch a Big Mac if you haven't fucked her.
currently buying a pregnancy test while braless so happy november to you too
It's my day off, I'm going to Target to check out Moms in yoga pants
I'm gunna wear a purple dress, so if you see someone looking confused and lost wearing purple it's probably me
my mom is feeding me weed brownies...god help us
Randomize
