oh and i feel obligated to inform you that there will be no sexin' because it's 'lady time' for me. so this ain't a booty call.
He asked for his proof of insurance and he pulled out a Magnum by mistake. All of the sudden gignger was looking real good to me.
I know. I just don't want anything else. I have no other desire. Just a ham sandwich.
I honestly don't know what to make of that.
A ham sandwich would be nice.
Working out to an exercise video on OnDemand. Also, drinking beer and eating cream cheese with a side of bagel in between stretches.
is he the 3rd person to bang everyone in our group?
Who was that guy I met at your brother's house who had to get stitches in his ass?
Just put a dog collar on someone's child.....was a great hit with everyone but his mom.......I think she hates me. I'm okay.with that
He knew exactly who I'd slept with after just one look at my crotch. He's like the Sherlock Holmes of cocks.
Id have to say flaming beer pong was a royal success.
She said she'll drive over, bang, and then head home. It's like ordering a pizza.
I just found out the guy that lied and blew me off got arrested, his mugshot is online. Life is good.
Really? A fat girl?
I'm walking her back. Chill out.
She is a nice girl okay. For some reason we are in my room though.
He's driving 2 hours to visit me and he's bringing weed. I love him so much.
Another thing to add to the list of things not to do while I'm drunk......explain to the upstairs neighborr how to have quiet orgasams......she now thinks I want to be part of a threesome......fuck my life
Like my mom really needs to know just how non existent my sex life is
Randomize