so i slept on a park bench last night...no hobo
It's safe to say that our attempt at trying to fuck in the grand Sierra elevator was a bad idea.
I kno. She bruised her chin trying to swim thru the hardwood floor.
She whispered into my eat that she wanted me to fuck her while her parrot watched...
Power hour was a bad idea. It turned into power 4 hours, then power puke. Then power sleep till 3.
This makes me miss penis. Not in a horny way... but in a sad, sentimental way.
Just had flashback to me showering u with stir fry as u rythed on the floor
Im playing the how drunk can i get before my card declines game. being single sucks. But getting drunk after work alone in fridays on a wenesday night sucks way more.
It took too long for people to come up with things in "never have i ever" so we had to change it to "Don't judge me but.."
theres 2 cans of open Campbell's soup on the counter and a note that says "guess which one is puke" ... want lunch?
There's a mechanical bull in the basement dude where are you
It's like a harem of immaturity and bad ideas...and that's coming from me
I think the highlight of my night is when I was eating a mayonnaise sandwich. drunk me was on point.
I can count on one hand the number of good things that happened over the past year.
It was all going good until I realized she was wearing underwear with a butt flap. Mission aborted.
Randomize
