ok think of it like jelly beans. if you can learn to like the licorice ones, youll always have lots of them because no one else wants them. its the same with fat chicks
You should just wear a sign that says "I like cheap Chinese food and anal"
I like taco bell too
He looked way older than 15. He probably thought that since I have braces I was 15. Fuck. The 6 year age gap is never to be spoken about. Especially because what happened constitutes as illegal.
I'm really proud of myself for not blacking out yet this weekend!
It's a Thursday.
He wrote on the paper that he wanted a "Ptitty burreto" from taco bell...when we ordered it the girl paused and entered "Potatoe burrieto"....we laughed
I'm more of a 'talk at me while I stare at you' kinda girl.
Holy shit, add "successfully got stoned secretly at a party where a cop was" to my list of accomplishments.
And then you two got up and shouted in near perfect unison "I'M ALWAYS A SLUT FOR BASKIN ROBBINS" The bar just looked at us horrified.
Yeah well, last time I said I wasn't having a big night I was being strangled in somebody's spare bed
just realized we fucked to the ultimate disney playlist last night. hakuna matata.
I almost accidentally threw him out a window during sex last night.
i woke up on someones kitchen floor, and i used the gps in my phone to find my way home. im really glad you forgot about me.
You proposed a left ass cheek firmness contest and got a surprising number of contestants. Then you ruined it by groping someone who wasn't playing and awarding them first place.
you thought the best thing to say to him was "you aint no fuckin cop"
If I wanna spend the whole night tied up and getting railed I'm allowed to do so
Randomize
