SOME GIRL GOT MAGGOTS IN HER COOCH FROM EXPERIMENTING WITH MAYO!
$1.99 mimosas n bloodys til 3. Happy hour starts at 4. We're gonna ride the mechanical bull to kill the hour inbetween.
Please take video.
I need to pack up my vagina and leave. We only do bad things together.
We smoked a bowl in front of the abortion clinic shouting Obama at the protestors.
Turn on the Discovery Channel
Lets fuck to motorcycle gang fighting
Using all my books as packing buffer for my liquor bottles. And you said being an English major was worthless.
I just saw two homeless guys bond over the fact that they both use Crown Royal bags as wallets in Burger King.
I held the blackjack dealer's hand and told the old asian woman she was 'soft to the touch, but cold as ice"
He told me he loved me and then peed his own bed. So at least it was a memorable one night stand.
Just bought a dildo. Happy first time single in four years Valentine's Day to me
So our bartender was in the bathroom the same time I was so I ordered a beer mid stream.....is that weird?
you said something about joining a k-pop band before passing out topless on the trampoline.
Question: how does one descretely ask the ice cream truck driver thats out at 10:00pm if he sells weed?
Stereotypically, lax bros last the longest, but have huge egos that are annoying. Baseball players barely last 10mins, but are really nice. And than we have soccer players, last long and have no egos. Me and my friends have collected our findings.
What do you do when you legitimately find a hidden sex dungeon in your parents basement next to your bedroom!!?
Randomize
