at some point when you're making out with the ex girlfriend of your ex fuck buddy who happens to be the ex boyfriend of the girl that you just got drunk with who was hitting on your current fuck buddy who is best friends with your ex boyfriend, it just hits you: oh my god i need to get out more and expand my social circle.
We just picked up about 540 lbs of women....
I make my boyfriend pay for half of my birth control. We call it his monthly rent.
its like national bring your ginger to the pool day or something
i woke up to the sound of my dad getting blown. this is my life
We're at that point in our relationship where sweatpants sex has become acceptable...
What happened to "I wouldnt even touch her with a ten foot pole"?
Her vagina devoured it.
She went dumpster diving. Found flourescent light bulbs, carpet samples and $15. We got a bottle of Popov, played star wars and threatened random people with the carpet. Get on our level.
you know it's gonna be a good 4/20 when you start saving up for it in january.
They're not that bad of drunks, they come back to the vehicle with more stuff than they went in with, so its a profitable venture.
I'm gonna take off my shirt and spin it around my head like petey Pablo so u can find us
The trick will be getting hammered before we get to the first bar
Challenge accepted
It's amazing
I want to run hundreds of miles and do a whole semesters worth of homework while flying on a unicorn and throwing endless glitter bombs
What's goes good with Everclear?
Pepto-Bismol and a sandwich.
Bring beers. The password is "I brought beers" but you can't come in if you're a liar
Randomize
