I just found a porn show called cleavagefield. no i am not watching.
i feel so shallow. people in iran are using twitter to write hardcore nathan hale shit about dying for freedom. my last tweet was "i hate the taco shits"
Girl next to me just ralphed in a bag. Congrats class of 2010
Tried to eat a chip. Mouth wouldn't cooperate. Nearly died. Wow I've missed this.
just got the results back. i love his dick even more now i know its clean
He told me since I'm into organics I should know his meat is known locally for its quality and hes hand raised it since age 13.
Me. You. Shitty green clothes from Savers that we will dub alligator costumes. Middle of the quad tomorrow at noon. Bring your alligator voice and the pearls before swine comic.
Please high five our old drug dealer for me please.
My dad just sent me a text reminding me to bring the family beer pong championship belt. Thanksgiving 2012 just got real
I'm taking a leave of absence and sending myself to fat camp. I'll let you know when I'm out.
My boss just high fived me after finding out i made it through lunch rush rolling on molly. To think this guy used to terify me.
The time to say "now you can't go and be strange about this at work" is not as you are penetrating your coworker. NOW its awkward
He puked in the middle of it and I still wasn't disappointed.
the fact that I can still put my shoes on is a testament to the fact that I can outdrink these bros
you asked me how to turn on the ladder
Randomize
