Well, she's an atheist who is addicted to the Sims.
Who isn't?
I successfully cooked a taquito with a lighter! My stomach hurts now tho.. im either guna blame it on the undercooked taquito or im feeling guily about porkin my brothers gf a lil bit ago
Ive been tazing him too get him immuned. He will be unstopable.
Seriously, in what other class can the final major discussion be what bar you're going to with your prof?
Don't use the things I tell you while drunk after the bruins won the cup against me
I'm practically paying him in tacos to have sex with me.
It was fun until the stripper told me it was her first day and started crying.
We need to step up our tailgating...they're here drinking out of a prosthetic leg
I have to confess something, I may or may not have knocked on your window at 2:30 am while balancing on some guys hands. We found tequila.
My nose was gushing blood and he just kept screaming "she took it like a champ" to everyone there. Plus side though, bartender felt bad for me and gave me a free drink.
fyi, pepper spray hurts. whoever comes up with the best backstory wins a prize.
I brought her cheeseburgers and tequila but she's still mad at me.
I knew I was in for a long night after I filled the empty pinata carcass with beer, bit off the top of one of it's legs and used it as a beer bong.
Never make a coconut bikini from a real coconut.
I smell like old thai food.
I hate waking up to a room that reeks of bad decisions...
Randomize
