i was just lookin through my fb pics and i think im with a cat in like 40% of them..: how sad is my life
bio was interesting today. swabbed my mouth to see what the cells where, ha. found a sperm cell. he was just that awesome
apparently i found nail polish and started playing a game i made up called "paint a nail, do a shot"
he was fingering me, then looked down and said "i like your socks"
He is going to sleep with me. That's all there is to it. I'm 4 for 4 right now. I'm not making it 4 for 5.
She gives me Chlamydia and somehow I'm still the asshole
Worst part of blacking out... Waking up and having to do the teeth check
I'm gonna have sex with my clothes on and I'll know everyone there so I'll be in my comfort zone
Anxiously awaiting my period drinking Hershey's syrup from the bottle. Don't judge me
Wrapped in a blanket, just ate a whole party pizza. All my dreams are coming true and you don't even care.
There is an alarming amount of urine in here.
I was chasing disarono with Bacardi and watching ice cube movies. It would have been an epic birthday if I wasn't by myself and actually had some decent friends.. Hint. Asshole.
I want my tombstone to read "making poor life decisions since 1993"
I'm literally rolling on acid for the first time during Thanksgiving. Help me.
I just found out why people like handcuffs.
Randomize
