did the walk of shame from ex-boyfriend's room only to find other ex-boyfriend sitting in the living room. some people shouldn't be allowed to be friends.
some people shouldn't be allowed to be desperate.
From behind she looks like Richard Simmons
I told him I was prego. He asked coul we do it without a condom now since I cldn't get any pregnanter. What an a-hole.
I just found out my first birthday was a keg party. Suddenly everything makes sense
apparently i was just sitting there with my shirt down holding my boobs saying "its ok. its all gonna be ok"
What did you wear last night? Because I'm pretty sure there are atleast 4 Facebook statuses about your walk of shame.
Just woke up to my stoned boyfriend building a shrine around my bare ass. He'll never leave me.
She just opened a six pack of corona with her car door ... I had no idea she was such a skilled drunk
I tried to say goodbye but you were hugging a trash can and I wasn't sure if you had clothes on
I'm in a pile of cheezits at an unfamiliar location watching dateline on tlc. Stage an intervention.
The condom broke. Its OK tho, turns out I was just humping her thigh for 20 minutes. Jager dude, Jager.
Well tech shes born nov 12, but since her head was out on the 11th, she claims both days as her birthday
You don't have a wife, you don't have a dog, and you need a new bong. Don't make this any worse than that.
Yeah, but i got vodka and bacon out of it, so it's fine.
I may or may not have puked near a bear on the side of the road this morning.
Randomize
