can't come. weird drunk guy passed out on couch. long story, tell u later.
wtf. wake him up, call him a cab, get over here!
i just want to make sure he doesn't die. or rob me. plus it's facinating, he's faceplant on the arm of my sofa.
We had to be out of the dorms at 730. Meeting started at 8. I woke up at 948. Drunk and covered in glitter.
We don't have a ruler. Come downstairs and lay in the snow with a boner so we can see how much snow we've gotten. Put your 8 inches to a less shameful use.
Next time we're there I want drunk pics of us trying to ride the stone lions downtown. Don't even attempt to fight me on this.
First day of class and I'm in a bar drinking pitcher #3. Foreshadowing?
if I see a bottle of vodka right now I'll probably throw up gum I swallowed when I was a kid
At what point in life does one make the conscious decision to incorporate capes into everyday life? Like, as a fashion statement?
I'm not sure how to answer that. Is it a general question or one you're wondering about for yourself? Because I don't think you're there yet.
If you've never yelled, "fuck you ray Lewis" in front of your 87 year old grandfather you haven't lived
Its was awkward last year cuz in the middle of it her mom bust In the room with noise makers and champagne
just reached the point where my breast implants paid from themselves in free drinks.
Our friendship just got weirder. He snapchated me the porn he was watching.
OH MY GOD did i pee on you?!
rock bottom is drinking straight vodka from a protein shaker, singing one direction and crying alone in your room. exams.
I had no plans to sleep with him, but he had to stay because of the snow. I always say, don't look a gift storm in the mouth.
Remind me to tell you about this weekend with them. It was the least fun I have ever had drinking. And I have thrown up pork and beer through my nose on the side of the freeway.
Randomize
