Just had another dream about being on Real Chance of Love. I think it's a sign.
Just saw a girl in a wheelchair puke then rally. Diversity matters.
My mom called me and we started arguing as usual. I finally screamed at her "I HEAR YOU AND THAT 30 YEAR OLD FUCKING!" and hung up. She hasn't called back yet. I win.
This does no justice to the amount of paint I'm covered in or the amount of balls I'm tripping.
I cannot believe I said bareback movement...
Just be happy that you're the pretty friend. Otherwise you would have had to walk home alone, like me.
I need to stop getting in the car with my dad when im rolling balls. I think he's starting to notice my eyes aren't usually completely pupil
Next time you see his dad you should let him know you are now Eskimo brothers.
If I hid at school to avoid the cops, is it fleeing and evading or just being a good student?
You fell out of the chair and then lifted your foot saying, "If my foot could give you the middle finger it would."
And then he dove into my vagina like scrooge mcduck into a room of gold
I was so high. I had so much hair. It was like all my hair follicles exploded.
new low: I blocked him from seeing my snapchat story in hopes he will text me because he'll be afraid I'm dead or something
It's official. My little brother has had more sex in my car than I have. I'm still tied with my little sister. I hate everybody.
Turns out naked twister is less fun than it sounds. I can never look Lee in the eye again. But Aimee's boobs are glorious.
Randomize
