the fucking easter bunny is here. he just made 3 cups in a row. no one knows who he is..
Using the ceiling fan to slice the hotdogs in mid-air can only be contributed to our liberal use of 1800.
You said, "can you make out with him for a little bit, I need a break."
It's a lightpost hitting you in the head. Of course it's going to hurt the day after.
I inadvertently smoked 6 blunts at one time. We just kept passing them around...I didn't know what happened until it was over. I can't walk.
Zombie crawl summary: 5 of 6 friends successfully laid. friend 6 too drunk to care and making out with a whale (not a costume)
i'm pretty sure i can feel a baby kicking just looking at him. if he didnt impregnate you, you officially have an iron-clad uterus.
YOU'RE CHANGING THE SUBJECT. I CAN BLOW SOMETHING UP OR I CAN TELL HIM YOU LOVE HIM, BUT ONE OF THE TWO IS BOUND TO HAPPEN
He just unloaded a dump truck full of red flags on my head.
YOU DONT EAT A GIRL OUT AND THEN GO PUKE ASSHOLE
We just catapulted a jelly bean off of his hard dick into his mouth.......Happy Easter!
sorry for pouring tequila vodka and whiskey down your throat and left you to sleep on a table
Will you still call me Bond when I'm sober?
He is in my tree wearing full on scuba gear ... Get here asap.
What happened last night?
Lets just say you asked me a couple times if you had eyeballs..
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