Strippers tramp stamp says "mom"
I just watched her pee in a trashcan, im still probably going to fuck her, what does that say about my standards
Just received a visit from the Ghost of Bad Decisions Past. Kind of weird 90% of the flashbacks happened in the same sixteen month span, the rest happened at Taco Bell.
She called him at 5 AM so that he'd be ready for her birthday breakfast and drinks at 6. This is why people don't need to wait until their 21st to have their first drink.
I am drunk. Riding an elevator. You can smell the beer. Doctor on with me just smiling at me... He agrees, fuck cancer.
I heard him say "bet you won't", look over 10 seconds later and she's blowing him.....looked eloquent under the glow of a camp fire.
Not sorry that my walk of shame this morning was barefoot on my scooter.
I spent half an hours grinding with a drunk Harry Potter cosplayer at the con rave. Pretty sure I felt his wand.
There is a time and place for BDSM, in-between disney sing-alongs is not one of them.
Also mom is not happy about me telling her how much i want the women sprinters on the Olympics to beat me up
I drank all the wines... and all th Doritos. Whilst watching Fat Camp. I need to reassess my values.
Is it bad that I like to have a guy to flirt with in every class? I feel like it's excellent motivation: to shave, to shower and to show up.
whenever dudes said you had nice tits you'd scream at them "This double push-up bra is full of deceit and lies!"
What do you mean relationship? He paid for my tires and I gave him a blow job.
This is what I get for listening to Christians.
Randomize