yeah my walk of shame consisted of driving on the wrong side of the road at 6am still drunk with cum drying in my hair and left eye.
We should bet how many people are going to get alcohol poisoning next weekend and whoever wins gets a free Starbucks.
I plan on being naked for at least 2/3 of the wedding.
This is why I can't have Wednesdays.... Or adult decisions.
Hey, if I'm gonna bastard a child and ruin his life, I'm going balls out.
Hamster emergency. Can u come in here
I might have snap chatted him. So here's what I need you to do. Find him. Abduct him. Get his phone. View the chat so he can't. Then, buy him ice cream. He deserves ice cream.
YOU KNOW BRAZILIAN BOYS ARE MY WEAKNESS
Everyone was in the walk-in getting high, and I had to be all cool. Serving soup and salads. Night manager status doesn't pay enough.
We are in Florida for 3 days. The people in charge of shit brought: a waffle maker, a cheese grater and a SEWING MACHINE
AND NO VODKA
You threw up in your own shoe then wore it home
I could drive to your house and kick you in the nuts right now....and not even stop for a burrito
not sure if actually covered in glitter or just drunk
I already popped my bottle of Rose and took my boxers off. No can do muchacho
after we fucked i left the room and when i came back he was patting his dick whispering "prouda you lil guy...prouda you"
Randomize