i wokr up in ohio with no clothes. i think someone gave me ecstacy. can you come find me please it's cold.
last night i found where hot topic managers go to die after they get fired.
Why do i always get involved with 3 women at once?
Because life brings drama and thus like moths to a flame, women
Definitely got drunk and sent her a literal picture of my asshole. I titled it " you"
My New Years Resolution is to come up with a new resolution monthly. January: decrease my shotgunning consumption speed to 7 seconds or less.
EVERYONE CAN HEAR YOU FUCKING YOU ARE IN A TENT
Everything sucks i just wanna cry and smoke a bowl and pet my cat and die. All at the same time
I just told a kid I was in a wheelchair because Santa shot me due to me being on the naughty list. You should have seen this little bastards face
Oh aight, and i was just going to be content with drinking, beating off and watching ninja turtles
Not my man #1 and if he likes it then he should put a title on it. Till then the gates of hell. Aka my vagina are open for entrance.
Is there evidence of another human being getting away with this/ not dying?
I've had more orgasms than showers this week.
I would also like you to tell your human bio class that I successfully smoked out the flu. 103 degree when I woke up yesterday. 100degree after one bowl. 4 more bowls and 16 hours later all that's left is a cough
theres a canoe in our lawn. we dont own a canoe.
it was the only safe place
He sent me a dick pic from a port-o-potty in Boston. If that's not love Idk what is.
Randomize
