your butthole totally puckers for the ginge
Drawing on your hand and calling it yenifer lopez doesn't count!
you dont need to remember merediths name haha. only jane
try this...when you orgasm scream his address including city state and zip...
Lol speaking of weird...he just sent me a naked pic of himself that said "meow" at the bottom.
after last night, i judge her for not breaking up with me
sorry about calling you the devil all night.
I wish i had a shirt that said, "I know what you're thinking and it's not herpes on my face"
Lauren she was gnawing on a dresser. Gnawing. On. A. Dresser.
she was masturbating to a video of herself masturbaing. She's a keeper
if creating a fake 8 year old brother, who lives with me and has had mono for the past month, to explain why I have ignored my group project members is wrong, then I... well then I'm probably going to hell
I remember halftime. Then I woke up in Spain. I need a drink in order to process this.
When they send me to rehab, I'm screaming your name down the halls.
The other night he asked if I had a condom and I said I had an IUD. and he goes OMG A BOMB?
Found someone cuddling with my Uggs this morning. Guess the hundred pillows laying next to him weren't good enough.
Randomize
