There's a man in a pair of gray footie pajamas and a paper crown watching the kids at the playground. It was easier to tell who was a pedophile before Where the Wild Things Are came out.
Family of uber douches all wearing ed hardy in a hummer taking up 2 parking spots at starbucks. Please be more cliche
I'm inventing beer flavored vodka. This raspberry shit makes me feel like a pussy.
i can't decided whether the fact that her nipples are bigger then her palms is a problem or not
im already regretting the extreme lack of break up sex that took place
Huh. I think I went to highschool with the hooker my neighbor just brought home.
Just like to put it out there it's surprising how little reception a dog cage has
I just feel like everything is too perfect
He's probably a serial killer or chronic masturbator
Or both. Which is common
do you think me going to the gyno dressed as a cat is inappropriate?
It's best not to have your booty call on social media. So if they post stupid shit, you still want to fuck them.
She passed out in my baby sister's room so we put her in one of my grandma's diapers, put a pacifier in her mouth, put her in my sister's crib and took pictures.
Maybe you should slow down tonight...
KINGS DON'T NEED ADVICE FROM LITTLE HORN-BILLS FOR A START
It was get out of line and go pee and get no beef briskit. Or stay in line, pee my pants, but have beef briskit. I really wanted my beef briskit
I gave in, made out with her, and long story short, I'm giving hetero another try.
FINE I guess I'll just drink regular coke like a PLEBIAN.
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