Pride was great cause we really can now appreciate how far we've come as gay people!
Doll, if you're still fucking strangers behind the WeHo Sonic while high on E then we've come as far as 2003...
dude.. you lit a cigarette on the bus and told the driver it was okay because you were fire marshall of your boy scout troop
phil was outside the bar last night, sitting on the ground playing songs on a guitar hero guitar to people walking by for money...best version of free bird ever
It honestly wasnt my fault this time. i was in shock. WHO THE FUCK OWNS A PEACOCK?!
A 40 year old man just put his hands on my thighs and said in these exact words "you're so beautiful and gorgeous and innocent. But life sucks and you'll probably turn into a whore."
If you have shit your pants within the past two years, please take a seat.
Come get me we have a petting zoo to throw up in.
Why is it that every study session with you turns into a hunt for drugs?
He said he cried as he watched porn yesterday; I'd say he's taking the break-up pretty bad....
His roommates came in the room and were throwing snowballs at us while we were hooking up.
He follows more cats on Instagram then he does girls.. That's how you know your boyfriend is whipped.
Grab some lube and condoms and you get a free shirt? College is weird
He was so drunk we almost didn't even make it to his place because he didn't know where he lived
there's crying, and people are upset, and there's a love triangle, and a broken heart, and so much estrogen
But what is a man profited, if he should gain Joe Biden and lose Alex Trebek?
Randomize
