Hey sorry i havent responded. i threw up on my phone while i was sleeping
One minute shes telling me about her volunteer work then she whips out a 12 inch dildo
He wouldn't know what to do with his penis even if they made a "how to get a blowjob for dummies" guide
I'd call her a cunt, but she dooesn't seem to have the depth or warmth.
Just assessed the damage in the bath. Two love bites. One bruise on the inner thigh. Strange awareness of what i'm assuming is my cervix. I've definitely missed you. x
I will always remember today as the day I narrowly escaped having to touch a tiny penis
We could supplement the Tour with Edward Andre-hands. Because 40s are for the 99%.
He was the one that got away. From my vagina.
He's way too stoned. I took him to el bra and he's laying on the table, not sure what to do with him
Just walked by the neighbors and they are definitely butt naked sitting on a bed, watching Netflix, baked out of their minds, with the blinds open.
Welcome to Bellingham.
Idk I was embarrassed that I hit it too hard so I played it off by spitting out bong water like a 'whales blowhole'
What's life without a pregnancy scare?
Just walked in and got handed a drink. Good service
Three times. Three times I left home yesterday in search for sex, and three times I returned un-orgasmed.
You know the bunny onesie you sent me? Happy Halloween, I just did the hop of shame.
Randomize
