good penises are hard to come by.... must be the economy...
so high. i feel like my whole body is a boner
I think you missed the wrong class. Im pretty sure we were taught how to buy cocaine.
While he was going down his phone rang and he answered saying I'll call you later I'm eating.
The trip involved octopus tentacles coming from the little holes in my TV's speakers. The beauty of the nonexistant symbolism had me in tears.
Sudue. BIG CUP LOTS OF NOMNOMD TUOSPY
This is breast cancer awareness month... The least we can do is give a stripper some singles.
Really?!? Does he think blocking me on FACEBOOK means that he doesn't have a kid with me?!
He tried to tell me that he could handle his liquor better than "all the bitches in this town." AS HE THREW UP. ALL. OVER.
There's someone howling in the parking lot. Haha.
As long as you don't want to make a shrine out of my eyelashes It's all good
And regarding bottomless mimosas stopping at 1 pm, there was a chick who drove her car into the back of the bar. Blame that bitch, not you peeing in the koi pond.
Ohhh the usual. Laying in bed reflecting on my decisions
I'm fucking my way through California and it's kind of fun.
i don't know when underwear became an acceptable clothing choice for parties, but god help me i hope this isn't a passing trend.
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