But regardless, you really stood out last night, you should give me a chance
Sorry but you seem like a potential womanizer
YOU GOT EVICTED FROM A TRAILER PARK!?!? WTF!!!!!
you think it's bad that I have four different guys toothbrushes in my bathroom?
Found a bar with a washer and dryer and they serve food. I never have to leave
i feel like i was in a swimming pool of captain and coke and had to drink my way out
hr gave me pretxwk salad and a doubke shot of grey goose. i approve! tou guys are a beautidil couple.
There's a 35% chance I'm still residually drunk from last night.
And you say you're not good with numbers...
we're going to the olympic park to run the 100m yeaaaahhh
it's 3am. Nothing could possibly go wrong here.
We are buying drugs from a guy with a Jesus fish on his dodge caravan.
Packing a mid day bowl in the Sonic parking lot. Have I gone too stoner?
Well, if it gives you any indication, when I got there, there was already some dude passed out naked in the treehouse.
I'm sun burnt so instead of getting drunk and trying to sleep with you, how about we get naked and you scratch my body and rub lotion on me while I rub one out?
Why am I cleaning the house twerking to anaconda wearing a bears jersey and helmet?
Shit. My boss is having me meet and greet with the new doc upstairs. Do you think his doctor powers will detect that I'm still high?
I must be really high or they really did just bring me a banana split instead of a burger
Randomize
