why am i having a flashback about somewhere we were this weekend with music videos playing? Spike jonze brothers place?? Help me out
"Tonight I'm turning swine flu into an std" this might be how zombies come about. Peace civilization.
She was mid-sentence and then BOOM the hammock broke off the tree. I about pissed myself. Hot Sprite and Vodka make the world go round.
You don't seem to appreciate the rareness of his junk.
Send me a picture. I'm more of a visual learner.
she asked me where ive been her entire life and the guy in the room next to us yelled "with other women bitch!"
I FINALLY HAVE A REASON TO DYE MY PUBES BLUE!!!
See what happens when I don't get laid? I make poor life decisions, like buying baby ducks.
Apparently I taped knives to my hands and made everyone call me wolverine
Can I borrow your google glasses to make a sex tape?
Pssh I just bang a girl in a single person tent. Thats like the back seat of a sedan.
She came out of the bathroom listening to her iPod and crying. Then she started scream 'she will be loved'. She seems to be handling the break up well lol
We were making eye contact while i was throwing up.
It involves me, my best friend, and a stripper and her mother.
I swear my vagina needs to be taken away from me when I drink.
I'm at work behind the bar and just washed my mouth out with rumple bc I don't have a toothbrush. This may be a new low.
Randomize
