i seriously hope you fucking die....you are the worst.
SHit! Sorry, sent to wrong person
I just hope my dad was drunk enough to not remember the whole convo we had about anal.
direct quote: "i'm so over my clit" either best or most awkward conversation possible with your COUSIN
Just dropped $150 at the liquor store. No power and two feet of snow has taken my alcoholism to another level.
Dude someone is playing the piano in the other room while I shit and it's making it really peaceful
Remember when we pinky swore we'd never feel hungover alone...
U know when u get really drunk and u don't think anyone can see what your doing? If I'm that drunk the possibilities are endless
do you ever feel so high you're swimming backstroke and then you realize you're still laying in bed on tumblr
My life is a video game called get the drunk princess back to her castle, thank you to all that participated
The walk home lasted longer than the sex. He lives in the flat above the bar.
I'm sorry I peed on myself in front of your boy toy. You should tell him I'm usually not that trashy. It was nice meeting him tho..
I feel like I should treat myself every time I find out I'm not pregnant. Is there a pie company that delivers??
I legitimately thought he died. I even called his mom at 3am and told her. Im done with vodka.
this dude is way too smart. he just explained to me the different scientific components of drugs while we smoked. i said i loved icecream.
Andddddd I'm drunk
Andddddd it's Tuesday
That's your opinion.
Randomize