I've been awake for 20+ hrs. What does that mean? I just realized if BSB were Twilight characters, Brian would be Jake and Howie would be Edward based on the video for "Everybody". That's unsettling.
It's unsettling that you took the time to think about that.
what is college for if not random hookup sex?
learning.
i would literally fuck learning if i could.
just woke up on my balcony. who won the super bowl?
You need to tell him your pregnant or we need to stop playing doubles beer-pong. My liver is begging you.
He got thrown out for leaning over the bar topless and pouring himself some beer while singing the james bond song
I wish dancing around my house in my bra and underwear to Love Shack whilst eating strawberry cake batter was an acceptable form of exercise.
At this point can I suggest a mail away bride. You judge Nick but you are a strange dude and that may be your ticket.
Dude you of all people would miss her giving him a handjob in front of the whole party
All I want to do is get high and needlepoint. Fuck your judgement
so the casino kicked my ass last night, i'm pretty sure i hit a new level of hungover....just showered with my sunglasses on because the bathroom light is too bright
His abs are so defined he looks like a human xylophone.
I just watched someone put a diaper on a cat..I'm to high for this.
I just found your shirt hanging in a tree 4 blocks from the party...in the opposite direction of your house. where are you going?
I think it's time for tequila and I to go our separate ways
Is texting an old booty call with "can you still get your ankles behind your ears?" an appropriate way to reemerge into the singles scene???
Randomize
