I just cleaned my sheets and decided to do a black light test. My headboard is a masterpiece.
people are starting to question the shark bite story
Someone just uploaded pictures on facebook of you making out with random girls. I'm telling you because I'm assuming you don't remember anything, but the 236 pictures in the album should give you a good clue.
So you actually don't remember giving head to the Neil Armstrong statue last night?
I miss the time when Mondays weren't the new Thursdays. I can't drink like my 17 year old self anymore.
just woke up in a camero on the way to nebraska, i would appreciate it if you answered your phone.
She was trying to drink out of the beer bong and she thought it didn't work. Little did she know there was no beer in there. Then she got mad at us. Girls.
My doctor was like "I think adderall is a great choice. It'll definitely benefit you and you say you've taken it before so you'll be fine!" \nAnd I was like "yeah bro, totally"
I'm high and having a granola buffet this has got to be the healthiest I have ever been
you seriously don't remember..? but then again, you were taking shots by yourself for like 30mins
I'm not real sure what dinosaurs sound like, but dude, she made dinosaur noises.
Crying while I'm pooping. I think this is rock bottom
she went outside...danced, got some snow, and put cherry vodka in it. she was so proud of herself.
i think if a sober person was watching us they would have not thought we were witty
tonight...tonight im having sex in honor of you
Randomize
