True but thats because hes a fetus.
i don't want you to think of me as your TA
She was blacklisted from the Uhaul center...what the fuck do you have to do to get blacklisted from a Uhaul center
I think throwing up in my her purse is probably why we broke up
Saddest moment ever is discovering when your cat no longer wants to get high with you.
My leg won't stop wagging. It's like it's congratulating my vagina.
your like the ambassador to my penis.
My bed smells like stale sex...I want it to smell like fresh sex, I miss you.
I just had a sexting conversation using medieval jargon. I think he is a fine suitor.
She was way too drunk so I dropped her off at her house and smoked a huge blunt with her mom.
.... I'm on a random couch somewhere in Newark wrapped in a Lightning McQueen blanket
So I paid Bumble $10 to see who liked my profile for a month. Cheap, easy dick. It's all about the economics, yo.
The only food I have to eat is weed gummies and magic mushrooms... This is peak 34
Apparently when you start crushing adderall and blending them into your margaritas calling them blenderalls you have "a problem" WTF
You ran up to my room. I was naked. You refused to leave without drugs. I love you.
Randomize
