YEA!!! I'll throw you a non-baby shower.
i'm chasing tequila w mint flavored ice cream, phil's chasing it w cream cheese, bashar's chasing it w pickles...i think we all know who the winner is....
Definitely still drunk while signing the 'responsible adult' form at the hospital
Good cause the way I see it, we are down to DAYS left of college so we should have as much naked fun as possible. And Jenga really facilitates that.
After four attempts, his condom would not flush. I had to remove it with salad tongs.
I don't know where Tiffany is but I just saw her shoes in the bar lost and found
I'm eating crumbled blue cheese out of Tubbaware. My life is nothing.
Either I'm deep cleaning my apartment out of severe academic procrastination or I'm subconsciously nesting and need to take a pregnancy test.
I won't apologize to a one balled man
dude he's still passed out in my bathtub. and his dick is half way in a 40 bottle... i really hope he was just trying to piss in it
She's in labor and I'm doing shots. Whose the real winner here?
He sent me a snap of him eating a tamale shirtless. I think I might be in love.
LOCK HIM DOWN.
Buying drug test kits off amazon. And qualifying for amazonSmile donation to a kids hospital feels wrong and funny at the same time xD
Thus began an intricate shell game of nude cardigan photos
The only words I could make out were "Dicksmash McIroncock".
Randomize
