p.s. you have a small clit
YOU ARE THE MOST AWKWARD PERSON ALIVE.
Already tried, she's too smart for that. I need a Primos "Do your wife in the butt" lure/call to trick her into wanting it
Defiantly just threw away our yearly bottle collection in front of the campus tour. The school should pay me for recruitment
You made out with a guy who refers to his cock as "rafiki." Are you proud of yourself?
I was having trouble getting it up so she grabbed it and said "no, it's too big to fail"
what kind of one night stand wants to walk you home in the morning? whole diff kind of walk of shame.
Called my house today and my 10 year old brother answered and asked if I was still in jail
I have 13 missed calls from when I slept outside on some rocks
pls come tAke this super bath no romo it's just. so nice.
He got the life proof phone case so he could jack off in the shower without his wife knowing
I just got his Save the Dave and, to answer your next question, NO I AM NOT GOING TO THE WEDDING OF THE GUY WHO GOT DRUNK AND CAME ON MY CHEST.
Unfortunately i'm awake, hungover, and covered in something I'm pretty sure is Easy Cheese. Send help.
Yeah, he threw a chair and hit her in the side of the head. She started hysterically crying and then proceeded to continue kicking our ass at beerpong. The girls got talent.
Ya can’t just go throwing accusations around about someone pooping their pants without some hard evidence
I texted him: “Come over for the Super Bowl. I promise lots of scoring.”
My divorce is turning into a porn script
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